What is Alka-seltzer?
1.
A white tablet devised by Bayer Industries to finally solve the world's pigeon problems. Also known as "pigeon killer".
I gave alka-seltzer to a pigeon and it exploded.
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2.
The act of taking a duece while in a hot tub. Since the hot tub is already churning water, bubbles, and blowing hot water, the turd will quickly dissolve like an alka-seltzer, leaving a nice fecal coloring to the water.
I was in Laura's hot tub last night, listening to Aaron Neville, and sippin' on a chilled glass of white zinfandale, when I decided to leave an alka-seltzer.
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