What is Arden Alarm Clock?
1.
The act of ejaculating into one's hand then slapping someone who is asleep with said hand. Particularily effective for its two-fold effect of confusion and anger on impact, then realization and horror of having cum on your face.
When Tuesday dropped the Arden Alarm Clock on Clint, Clint recalled with a hearty smile the daily remembrance of waking with a yellow, crusted cheek.
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The candy bar of health food
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The act of falling asleep on public transportaion, including, but not limited to, subways, buses, trains, taxis, etc.
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