What is Asheboro?
1.
this little city may be a dry town, but it is also a major port for drug trafficing between Florida and New York. there are two kinds of people who live there. type A people know all other type A people because their parent's parent's parents all grew up there too, nothing happens without them knowing about it within 24 hours. type B people moved there and speak english as a second language. type A people view type B people as the enemy. the main attractions in a*town consist of the NC State Zoo! and the 24 hour walmart. there is also the poor excuse for a mall. when in asheboro, don't forget to root for the home team, the asheboro blue comets of asheboro high school of the exciting asheboro, nc.
if you bring up the name "asheboro" outside of asheboro, people will think you are talking about asheville. also, it takes approximately 10 minutes to drive through asheboro on hwy 64.
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2.
A shitstain on the bigger shitstain that is Randolph County, North Carolina. Full of self-centered bigots and drug addicts that perpetuate themselves as they continue to dwell and breed there. Home of a mockery of a zoo and the only things going for it now is its allowing of booze to be sold and RCC's photography program. Home to a mall that could be considered Greensboro's Four Seasons' bastard child. Home to a highly discriminative and brutish police force who stop at nothing to fuck anyone over, even for something as simple as an expired inspections sticker. Home to a Nazi administration at Asheboro High. Known to devour people's entire souls without them even knowing. Part of it wants to be like Greensboro, and the other half wants to be like the rest of Randolph; dull and desolate. It'd be best to steer clear of this place.
I saw the city sign for Asheboro and it read:
"Welcome to Asheboro, Home of the North Carolina Zoo"
and below it read,
"Abandon all hope ye who enter..."
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