Autozoner

What is Autozoner?


1.

An employee of the Autozone Corporation that is expected to know everything about your shit green Plymouth Voyager or your decaying Nissan Maxima that has thirty different engine codes, a missing fender, and various dings and dents covering its decrepit body. An autozoner must be a first-class bullshitter to conjure such ridiculous answers to questions like “what the fuck do you mean I can’t get a valve cover gasket for my Daewoo Lanos?!” or the ever so popular caliper bracket for any given jalopy. Autozoner’s whole heartily love to hear the words “I’m going to Advance” or any of the other incompetent auto part’s stores to get these ill-bred people out of our store. Autozoner’s dread the question “well, can you just come out and look at it?” just take the fucking thing to an actual mechanic you inconsiderate fuck-up.

I hate being an Autozoner.

See autozone, autozoner, mechanic, greasers, low lifes

2.

A valient and courageous employee of Autozone. He goes to work each day knowing that at least once a day, for as long as he works at Autozone, someone will ask for a part for a primer grey car. The customer wil never have any year, make, or model information on the car and will often times use terms like " the stuff with the what not" to describe the part to said employee with the expectation of Autozone employees to be both on-site mechanincs and clairvoyant.

Autozoners should get paid more to deal with stupid shit.

See wage slave, slave, whore, bitch


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