What is Awkward Blastoise?
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When an awkward turtle is insufficient for the awkwardity of the situation, one must "evolve" their awkward turtle into the Awkward Blastoise. This hand configuration uses the pointer and pinky finger of the top hand as Hydro Pumps to douse the situation.
While visiting his girlfriend's parents, Rob farted at the dinner table very loudly. The mom implemented the awkward turtle, but was immediately over-ruled by the dad's more appropriate use of the Awkward Blastoise in order to sufficiently encompass the awkwardity of the situation.
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An imaginary entity that can be blamed for any number of random injuries sustained from a night of drinking, for which one can't re..
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An extremely obese and/or heavyset person. See Michael Moore.
Oh my god, have you seen tub-o-lard's latest crapumentary?
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