What is Basingstoke?
1.
Also known as "Amazingstoke"
A very affluent town in the south of England.
You may spot the odd chav or pregnant teenager but is mostly full of young, fashionable people who know how to have a good time.
The majority of people go to college and uni, because they are CLEVER.
However, if you are looking for a nice, decent guy who will treat you right, do not come looking in Basingstoke. The town is full of so called "playas", dickheads, arseholes, wankers who all think they are God's gift to women.
For some reason the shopping centre has 2 Starbucks, 2 Costas, Tchibo and a lot of other small coffee shops, WHY?!
There are quite a few fatties in this town, mainly caused by the 3 McDonalds and 3 Pizza Huts.
Supermarket and Leisure Park carparks are the preferred hang out for "boy racers" and general saddos.
People who went to Bishop Challenor School are known as Bible Bashers, people who went to Brighton Hill are Yellow Bellies and Fort Hill and John Hunt are just terrible schools. Aldworth Science College is where its at!
Rough areas in Basingstoke include Popley, Oakridge, Buckskin and some parts of South Ham i.e Burnaby.
People from Kempshott, Chineham, Old Basing and Hatch Warren like to think they're rich and posh, but are mostly all on drugs.
Generally a good place to live, as long as you have money, you won't get bored.
"Wow isn't Basingstoke AMAZING!!"
See
2.
Also known as;
Basingrad
Boringstoke
Basingjoke
Amazingstoke
Basingvegas
Rated from worst to best names (i.e. Basingrad is bad, Basingvegas is good).
Guy: Hows Basingstoke at the moment?
Girl: It's been a bit Basingrad lately.
Guy: Hmmm.... Call me again when its more Basingvegas.
See
3.
To Basingstoke vb. The act of adding Tomato Ketchup to a meal. So named after the town in Southern England UK where people mainly add ketchup to their food. However it is refered to as “Red sauce” Reason?: They arn’t allowed to use 'posh’words like ‘ketchup’ in case the studio audience in their head goes wooooooh or someone says, “Woooooh, swallowed a dictionary have we?”
You might ask why red sauce rather than simply “Tomato Sauce”? This is because the only, other sauce is Brown! Therefore K****** is called Red sauce. i.e “Bacon samwij
mate, wiv red sauce init”
There’s no point in giving him fillet steak he’ll just “Basingstoke” it, just you watch. Frying steak will do and make sure it’s well done. Oi! you “Basingstoke”
types, here are some serving suggestions for you:-
Red sauce:-
On Fillet steak (Instead of Sauce Bearnaise )
On Turkey (Instead of cranberry sauce)
OnSunday Roast (Instead of horseraddish, apple or mint) Not that they’d be seen eating a sunday lunch after “That” Mc Donalds add portraying the dish as something for posh types or grannys.
On Kebab (Instead of chille sauce)
OnCauliflower (Instead of cheese sauce - not that they’d ever eat cauliflower as it’s a vegetable........and they’re a chav! )
On Kedgeree (Instead of curried sauce)
Caution: Don’t have “Red Sauce” in a bacon sandwich or on fish and chips otherwise your chav hatted chums might think you were not very gangsta. Instead try
Bar-B-Que sauce!
See
4.
To Basingstoke vb. The act of adding Tomato Ketchup to a meal. So named after the town in Southern England UK where people mainly add ketchup to their food. However it is refered to as “Red sauce” Reason?: They arn’t allowed to use words as ‘posh’ as ‘ketchup’ in case the studio audience in their head goes wooooooh or someone says, “Woooooh, swallowed a dictionary have we?” You might ask why the alternative and dumbed down name is red sauce rather than simply “Tomato Sauce”? This is because the only, other sauce is Brown! Therefore K****** is called Red sauce. i.e “Bacon samwij mate, wiv red sauce”
There’s no point in giving him fillet steak he’ll just basingstoke it, just you watch. Just give him frying steak and make sure it’s well done. Hey you “Basingstoke”
cunts, here are some serving suggestions for you:-
Red sauce wiv:-
Fillet steak (Instead of Sauce Bearnaise )
Asparagus (Instead of Hollandaise)
Turkey (Instead of cranberry sauce)
Sunday Roast (Instead of horseraddish, apple or mint) Not that you’d be seen eating a sunday lunch after “That” Mc Donalds add portraying the dish as something for posh cunts or grannies.
Kebab (Instead of chille sauce)
Cauliflower (Instead of cheese sauce - not that you’d ever eat cauliflower as it’s
a vegetable........and you’re a chav! )
Kedgeree (Instead of curried sauce)
Caution: Don’t have “Red Sauce” wiv a bacon sandwich or wiv fish and chips otherwise your chav hatted chums might think you were traditional and not very gangstah. Instead try using Bar-B-Que sauce!........cunt.
See
5.
Terrible town of the south, full of
Lads, lets go get some skanky whores from basingstoke!
6.
Get a grip!
From the Gilbert and Sullivan opera Ruddigore
A: *goes on and on on some hysterical riff*
B: Basingstoke!
7.
Very poor southern imitation of
Hes from Basingstoke, poor bastard.
See
