Beardpop

What is Beardpop?


1.

Light, non-threatening, drifty-twinkly-jazzy music that is made by a very serious man in a small room on a computer. Aimed at an audience who like to stroke their chins while listening, trying to pretend that they are serious music lovers, when really they are listening to elevator music.

Otherwise known as idm (intelligent dance music), as described by people who are so scared of looking stupid, they actually put the word "intelligent" in the name of their favourite music genre. The music is undanceable but they put the word "dance" in it because they wish they could dance. And it's not really very musical so they put the word "music" on the end for safety.

Other people call beardpop electronica because it is so unimaginative that there are absolutely no ideas in the music, and listeners are left with only soulless electrical signals.

minimal technois a close relative but modified for people that want to dance, a bit, robotically, without the offbeat funkiness required in uk garage, drum and bass or hip hop.

They were playing so much beardpop I fell asleep on the dancefloor, and I didn't wake up for seven hundred years.

See idm, dance music, music, electronica, elevator music, boring


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