What is Best Buy?
1.
A corporate electronics store that doesn’t care what electronics you buy, as long as you buy “extras” with it. No one in the company besides from the CEO's and the Investors have any kind of degree after high school, or if they do they won't stay there long because they can't stand all the bullshit propaganda.
Best Buy employee at register: Hi welcome to Best Buy. Will you be putting this purchase on you Best Buy Card today?
Customer: No.
Employee: Would you like to sign up for a Best Buy card today?
Customer: No thanks.
Employee: Do you have a Best Buy Rewards card?
Customer: No.
Employee: Would you like to sign up? It’s only $9.99 and for every $125 you spend…
Customer: No thanks.
Employee: Would you like to purchase an Extended Service Plan on this? If anything goes wrong in the next 4 years…
Customer: No.
Employee: Would you like to sign up for 4 free weeks of Sports Illustrated or Entertain…
Customer: No
Employee: Would you like to try Netflix free for 2…
Customer: NO.
Employee: Would you like to try a free trial of Rhapsody music service? It allows you to…
Customer: NO!
Employee: Your Purchase today enables you to get a free trial of an Internet Service Provider. We offer AOL, Net Zero…
Customer: NO GOD DAMNIT!
Employee: The cables that come with this are very low quality. I would recommend getting some Monster Cables. They’re only 69.99 and will greatly increase sound and picture quality.
Customer: WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM???
Employee: Would you like any extra batteries to go with your remote?
Customer: FUCK YOU!
Employee: On the bottom of your receipt there’s a survey and if you do it you will be put in a drawing to win a $500 Best Buy gift card.
Customer: SHUT UP! JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!
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2.
An unholy retail industry that has redundant training, and providing you survive, will indoctrinate you into their low level "blue shirt" cult. The blue-shirts think they are truly respected by upper level management because of the brainwashing recieved during training, but really, they are laughed at whenever seen.
Best Buy has become the Mecca of Nerds, the blue shirts are the priests that molest them.
3.
A major store containing a wide variety of electronic-related items, as well as books, microwaves, refrigerators, and chairs. Best Buy is known for pissing off people too stupid to know how to purchase things correctly, or too stupid to know how to work properly. Specifically, the people who posted definitions of Best Buy before this proper definition.
If you purchase a DVD the day/week it comes out, Best Buy gives you a discount on it.
4.
noun, The hellish fire-beast of corporate america that disolves childrens minds and brings horrifying amounts of debt to those who follow it. The only known remedy is suicide.
Derived from the famed "Beast of Buying"
A mythical Creature from the depth of hell sent to force those with weak constitutions to purchase items well beyond their price range.
see also:
Hey honey I'm going to Best Buy.
Look at all the great deals, here at Best Buy.
I love Best Buy.
Best Buy is Great.
Best Buy took my children from me because I bought a damn TV and the fine print on the contract said they could.
5.
Highly over priced place people call a store where a simple cell phone charger costs $40 dollars and everything costs $20 to $300 dollars more than anywhere else!
Hey bob want to go to best buy and get a dvd?Sure I have $60 dollars I can buy 1 dvd.
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6.
a large retail electronics company located all over the world, that offers reward zone, credit cards, service and replacement plans, magazines and millions of other things no one actually needs. their cashiers also need to give a 10 hour speech to each customer, which makes the lines extremely long.
Cashier: Hi how are u today?
Customer: good u
Cashier: im great! did u find everything okay today?
Customer: uh yeah.
Cashier: super! are u a rewards zone member?
Customer: no and i dont want-
Cashier: GREAT! ill go ahead and sign u up for a free membership today! all i need is ur phone number and address
Customer: no i really dont want one, i have too many cards
Cashier: oh come on its free! every time u spend $250 u get $5 back and other discount coupons on popular items!
Customer: alright fine..
Cashier: and im gonna give u some information about our reward zone credit card that gives u double the points for using it in the store and regular points wen u use it outside of best buy.
Customer: ok..
Cashier: and on this item we have a 4 year service plan for $99.99. it covers, dust, heat, humidity, normal wear and tear, power surge, and any defects with the product.
Customer: no ill be fine without it.
Cashier: i would highly recommend it, considering if u deal with the manufacturer, u would end up paying for shipping and handeling as well as some parts and if best buy couldnt fix this item for u they would give u a new one.
Customer: ill live without it.
Cashier: WELL if u wanna think about it, u have 30 days to come back and purchase it. AND to thank you for shopping with us today we are GIVING you 8 weeks risk free of either People, Entertainment Weekly, Sports Illustrated, or Time magazine, which ones do u like?
Customer: no thank u.
Cashier: are u sure? it would make a great present. wouldnt ur wife like People?
Customer: no i already get enough magazines and i will forget to cancel it.
Cashier: well with the 2nd to last issue it comes along with a card that notifies u cancel the trial, its very easy
Customer: no thats really okay, i dont want it.
Cashier: alright ur total is $456.98...okay do u want ur receit with u or in the bag
Customer: the bag
Cashier: okay and on the bottom of ur receit there is a website u can go to. bestbuycares and if u take a fast survey its a chance to win a 10,000 dollar shopping spree.
AND ur all set. THANK U HAVE A GREAT DAY!
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7.
Asshole Corporate store run by mostly brainwashed employees (including the managers). They don't care what product you buy, as long as you buy extra services with it.
employee: Hello, will you be paying for this with your Best Buy card today?
customer (who has a lot more education than any BBY manager): No thanks.
employee: would you like to apply for a Best Buy card today?
customer: No thanks.
employee: Do you have a Rewards card?
customer: No
employee: Would you like to sign up for one today? It's only $9.99 and for every hundred dollars you spend...
Customer: NO
employee: Would you like to sign up for a free trial of Sports Illustrated or Enterta...
Customer: NO!
employee: Would you like to try Netflix free for 2...
Customer: NO!
employee: How about a free trial of Rhapsody music...
Customer: NO GOD DAMMIT!
employee: Are you happy with your internet service? Because we offer Aol, Net Zero, and...
Customer: NO MOTHER FUCKER!
employee: Would you like a Product Service plan with that? It offers...
Customer: I DON'T WANT ANY OF YOUR FUCKING SHIT!
employee: You know that includes low quality wires and I would reccomend buying some Monster Cables. They're only 79...
Customer: WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM!
employee: I'm a brainwashed corporate shill and I work for the best company in the world.
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