What is Bike Nazi?
1.
Someone who spends all of their day-job money on a shiny fixed-gear and looks down their nose at 'inferior' bicycles, especially anything comfortable and/or with a basket attached. Most likely to be found in dense urban areas, but also foray into the suburbs from time to time.
Cyclist biking to work: (nod and smile)
Bike nazi: (stares straight ahead) Fucking Freds.
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2.
Bike Nazis are city nerds who show up in rural areas with urban attitudes, dressed in strange alien garb such as dumpy ass spandex pants, pointy head helmets and tard shoes. They do dumb shit to piss off the farmers who really use the roads for their livelihood like ride 3 abreast in a 55 mph zone so you can't get around them. They give attitude to everyone. They are nothing but a pain in the ass.
Nice shoes there slick. If you didn't look stupid enough with your bony ass in spandex and that stupid looking helmet, the shoes take it right over the top. At least that farmer will be able to see your bike nazi ass before he runs over you with his combine.
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3.
Often a jock as$#ole (likely lives / rides exclusively in Boulder, Colorado), who not only feels bikes are equal to & deserve all rights that cars have, but feels bikes (and bike-nazi jerks like himself) are superior to autos / drivers and don't even need to follow traffic rules, stop signs, etc.
Often belligerent & arrogant when riding among or dealing with automobiles and automobile drivers.
Being mostly macho, type-A, latent-homosexual jock as$#holes (always wearing goofy looking bug-hat helmets and skin-tight, lycra bike shorts / 'penis pants'), they often flip the bird and shout epithets like "faggot" etc. at auto drivers they feel did not give them enough room or what they deem as the 'proper respect.'
Some Boulder 'bike nazi' started a fight at an intersection with an unsuspecting automobile driver whom the nazi thought had tried to cut him off.
Unfortunately the kid driving the car was armed, got scared, and shot the nazi in the face.
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4.
A bicycle rider that thinks bikes should be treated like cars and ride according to that precept. It doesn't matter that bikes can't travel 45 mph in traffic and consequently screw up traffic and cause apprehension and hesistation for surrounding vehicles who don't know whether they can pass the stupid douche. Even though almost all American streets are not designed to accomodate bike traffic, bike nazis insist that drivers "share the road" when doing so is unsafe and not practical.
If your name ain't Lance Armstrong, get the fuck off the road, stupid bike nazi!
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