What is Billy’s Bolmph-‘gin?


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1. Short for William Taft IV’s Do-It-Yerself-Hand-Cranked-Bolmph-Engine. A mechanical apparatus invented during late 18th century by a southern plantation owner. Invention’s whose sole purpose is to stimulate the penis for masturbation. It consists of a wicker chair with an unsanded, unvarnished wooden box or cylinder that could be swiveled in place over the lap. Device was operated by a cast iron handle and crank on the right side to create a vibrating motion by turning a number of gears, sprockets and ratchets. Later models included a cast iron lever on the left side to simulate a pulling motion on the penis. When first tested by William in 1787 he was killed shortly after, when the lever broke off due to rapid pulling; and he drove several large wooden splinters into his pubic region, which became infected.

No longer in production

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