What is Buzzard?
1.
A person who hangs out and smokes all your weed
Hey go get your own weed you dame buzzard
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2.
buhz-erd n. originates in Elgin, IL.
a contemptible white trash plastic Graphix bong smoker. Duplex or trailer dweller. A person with feathered hair, tight stone washed jeans with oil stained white T's. Some still carry combs in their back pockets and most are known to indulge in Marlboro Reds.
Can be seen with a buddy leaning over muscle car engines with a 30 pack of Old Style either after work as the sun goes down or on sweltering weekend afternoons.
Do not attempt to battle a buzzard because there is always another one lurking behind a dumpster waiting for a cheap shot. Buzzards are known to carry knives, chains and/or brass-knuckles.
Lack of teeth is fairly common in a buzzard due to meth-amphetamine use or due to perpetual knuckle-sandwiches.
The only thing more dangerous than a buzzard is the pregnant wife of a buzzard. When a woman is of buzzard her behavior is unpredictable and erratic.
The only things that can be used to calm a buzzard are: low-grade marijuana, Penthouse backorders from the 80's, Boones Farm wine and the lulling tunes of Sammy Hagar.
"That buzzard stole my carburetor."
"That buzzard suckerpunched me outside Danny's pizza."
"You're turning into a fucking chainsmoking buzzard!"
"You're moving to South Elgin? Are you trying to get in tune with buzzard culture?"
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3.
Any object, visual, sensual or stimulating of any other sense that holds the characteristics appertaining of Buzzardace.
A disgusting object or situation.
Buzzard Things-
Incest.
Bad Smells.
Mold.
Some people.
Illuminous Orange.
Chavs.
Piercings.
Text Speak.
Buzzard Situations-
Professor Heinrich- And the thing that perplexed me the most about the intriuge of the deciduous deux ex machina was the exquisite irony of a dodecahedronal mammal surmounted off its homo-sapien cousin of submission and shameful ridicule by its society's peers.
Rick the stoner- ...Yeah, I know, it's buzzard.
--
Kelly- I wouldn't drink out of that glass, my brother just farted in it.
Jenny- Buzzard!
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4.
A streetwalker that is almost always intoxicated while gaining teenagers respect by their willingess to purchase them alcohol.
Known buzzards are: frying pan man, Artie and whitey.
We need beer tonight, lets go cruise Union Ave to look for buzzards.
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5.
In the rural midwest (Oklahoma, Texas, etc.): a dignified, countrified, vulgar man ranging from middle to old age. Usually sporting a dark tan from years of construction, plumbing, painting, or roofing work in the sun. Buzzards can be identified as wearing Levi's snap button shirts with a soft pack of Doral lights in the front pocket, old Wrangler jeans hanging past their crack with a snuff can ring on the back pocket, paint spattered, dusty work boots, and any assortment of old baseball caps. They listen to '70s country music (Waylon Jennings, Willie Nelson. Merle Haggard, Hank Williams Jr., David Allan Coe) and frequent pool halls and state fairs. Some buzzards overlap into the biker subculture, wearing long ZZ Top beards, black leathers, and sporting tattoos. They are tough on the outside, but generally teddy bears when you get to know them.
They are separated from the redneck subculture in that they have a dignity about them - a stoic pride from years of work and hard living. Some buzzards have a romantic disposition about the world around them and are more good timin' men that belligerent white trash.
Buzzards can be defined perfectly by this line from a Waylon Jennings song:
"Those that don't know him won't like him and those that do sometimes won't know how to take him."
"Let's go get a beer in that buzzard bar over there. Those buzzards are burly and hilarious."
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6.
usually intoxicated, slurring, and often confused for a moron. Often recieves fellatio in high traffic area's.
look at that buzzard get head in Telley's chair.
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7.
a big fat rashy skank that hangs out at closing time around filthy cowboy bars, lookin' for some sodomy.
I drove by Crazy Horse last night and there were 4 or 5 buzzards hanging out front.
