Cancer

What is Cancer?


1.

A disease lacking a sense of humor.

Damn, Cancer, you really killed that dude.

2.

Cancer is what things like smoking, exposure to radiation, genetically enhanced food, and furbies cause.

Doctor:Well Mr. Smith, you have stomach cancer and you have 3 months to live, you have no money, your house has been reposessed, your children sent to work in a sweat shop in thailand for 3 cents an hour making Nike's, and your wife has no where to go and will most likely die due to starvation, but I do have some good news.

You:..............

Doctor: I just saved money on car insurance by switching to Geico.

3.

One disease to rule them all. Anything and everything causes cancer nowadays, which is somewhat depressing. There is no true cure for any form of cancer, but there just might be if the human race would stop warring with itself and concentrate on destroying diseases instead.

My God! Jimmy! Stay away from the sun! It causes CANCER! My God! Jimmy! Don't eat that! It causes CANCER! MY God! Jimmy! Don't breathe in school! IT CAUSES CANCER!

4.

4th Astrological sign for people born between June 22-July 21.

Cancers rock...

5.

Cancer is so very limited

It cannot cripple love;

It cannot shatter hope;

It cannot corrode faith;

It cannot destroy peace;

It cannot kill friendship;

It cannot depress memories;

It cannot silence courage;

It cannot invade the soul;

It cannot steal eternal life;

It cannot conquer the spirit;

6.

A disease caused by everything.

Bob got cancer from breathing, maybe we should stop so we don't get cancer!

See Matt

7.

- Any of various malignant neoplasms characterized by the proliferation of anaplastic cells that tend to invade surrounding tissue and metastasize to new body sites.

- The pathological condition characterized by such growths.

A pernicious, spreading evil.

- A term often used as an insult when referring to someone who is a pathelogical source of trouble and discord within a group. Sadly, this word is usually used as an insult when the moronlooking to talk trash about another person, and just can't come up with anything more original. See skippy mcnipplehead, hag, clannie, chickenshit, and the queen.

Use one and two: "How sad, did you hear about George? He was diagnosed with cancer."

Use three: "I'm taking measures to make sure that this crap doesn't happen anymore. I usually try to stay out of it, but I've hit my limit. Now it's my turn. Remove the cancer...then and only then can the healing begin. We'll be ok."

To which a proper response would be...

"Hell, If we're "CANCER", then ya'll are "AIDS", because at least we only destroy ourselves... you people destroy each other."


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