What is Cell Phone?
1.
A device for communicating with others needlessly. Day in. Day out. Whenever. Wherever. Good for holding up lines in stores, traffic, etc. Also the latest technology found in ghettos-overtaking the more common "boom box".
Typical cell phone conversation: Hey, where you at? I'm over here. Oh. What? I dunno. I'll be there in 5 seconds....oh wait I can see you! Hey! Whats up? Wait...let me call you back. Why? Huh? Can you here me? Guess what? My phone bill was only $90 this month. Etc.....
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2.
Objects which are beginning to be given to little girls in 2nd grade who have no place to go thus have no reason to hvae one except to show it off, which pisses me off. They prance around in their little midriff baring shirts trying to be Brotney Spears when infact they look like little spoiled riches bitch sluts, whose parents have no idea what the words Discipline, and hard work mean.
Becky: Like OMG Stacy I just got the coolest new cell.
Stacy: Like OMG we can use it when we drive our barbie jeeps around the block.
Me(overhearing the conversation): WTF
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3.
A number you should NEVER EVER give to your boss.
Trust me on this one
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4.
a leash or locating device
My parents called me on my cell phone to make sure I wasn't having sex.
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5.
In the olden days, movie theatres used to have orchestras to accompany the film. Today, they have cell phones, a portable communication device sent from Hell. It is fine if used in moderation, but it almost never is.
"Marsha, I don't know what I'd do without you. But I'm afraid I must reveal that the secret killer of our lovers is…"
**Brii-i-i-i-i-i-iiiiii-i-i-iii-ii-ng!**
"Hello? Hi! Yeah. What's up? Uh-huh. Me too. Eh, nothing much. In the middle of a movie. What? No, I didn't yet. Wait…hold on. People are being rude and throwing things at me."
6.
A device that popular teenage girls use to waste their parents' money.
Lisa talked to her boyfriend on her cell phone for 9 days without stopping. The call cost her parents $50,000.
7.
A device that everyone owns and bitches about, at the same time.
"That guy with the cell phone is so obnoxious for talking on this train...wait, I got call waiting! Can you hear me?! Can you hear me now?!!!!"
