What is College Massage?
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A vigorous kneading or rubbing of one person's body, most frequently the shoulders and back, by the hands of a friend or acquaintance. Usually exchanged between college or high school students with seemingly
Joe: "Boy, you look sore, Sarah. Why don't I help relax those achy muscles?" <Moves to place his hands on her shoulders>
Sarah: "No dice - I can see through your pathetic attempt at a college massage, Joe, and I'm not interested."
See
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Jjust being anything other than sober to the Nth degree probably means you are off your face.
e.g being drunk, stoned, high on somethin..