What is Crane Theory?
1.
The theory that all cranes are derived from previous cranes. All cranes build subsequent cranes. However, this creates a contradiction. From where were the first cranes derived? This is where crane theory steps in. God created a certain number of initial natural cranes. These cranes were perfect. They can nowadays typically be found in remote areas where it would otherwise be impossible to build a crane from scratch. Cities emerged in their current locations because there was originally a high concentration of the original cranes there.
Clay: "Hey dude, check out that crane."
Brantley: "That one is kind of out there by itself...it must be one of the originals."
Clay: "Originals?!"
Brantley: "Yea, God built the first cranes - it's how all subsequent cranes were built. Haven't you ever heard of crane theory?"
Clay: "OIC."
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