What is Crumpeting?
1.
A British public school tradition generally practised by the upper classes, in which a crumpet is super-heated, covered in butter, and thrust between the buttocks of a chosen schoolboy. Often used as an initiation ritual. The crumpetee is expected to clench the hot crumpet between their buttocks as the butter runs down their backside, burning them. Should they allow the crumpet to fall, a greater punishment is often chosen.
This tradition is also practised among young gentleman's dining clubs and junior commissioned ranks of the military.
"I say, old boy! If Jenkins is to join this dining club, I expect him to tolerate a jolly harsh crumpeting!"
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1.
When a man and woman are having sex, the man takes a dump on his partner's chest. With the shit in place, the man turns around and ..