What is Desert Man?
1.
That guy from a girl's past that she will always go back to no matter what. No matter how badly he treated her, how badly it finished or how nice a guy you are, chicks always always go back to Desert Man.
Desert Man tends to appear in a bar when you're just about to score or in other inopportune situations like your wedding day.
Named after the Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon dude who steals the girls comb, rides off into the desert and then kidnaps and fucks her. Chicks dig that shit.
You - "So, hey we've been getting on really well and I thin we've got something real special going on..."
Her - "Yeah, me too, you're really great. I've never felt this way about anyone befo... Ohh, is that Desert man over there?"(swoon)
Desert Man - (kidney chops girl and throws her over his shoulder) "Back to the desert with us for some dirty desert-lovin' bitch."
You - "Fuck..."
See