What is Dick Squelch?
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The noise made when you are in the bath and you "take care of yourself" above the water, but some water has got into your foreskin so it squelches, this is usually done instead of below water as the splashing noise usually gives it away, however dick squelches are even more obvious then below water "dick splashes".
"Alex, whats that noise? are you dick squelching" "no mum!"
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