What is Edcook?
1.
Noun, from the ancient Samarian, Edzacock: A tall lumbering predator that inhabits dark smoky places, known for its insatiable appetite, its fondness for one legged Mormons and an uncanny ability to deny it is wrong.
The heard of edcooks stoop in hustled silence as they sight a female jiggling rhythmically as if to the sound of tribal drums pounded at breakneck speed. Driven crazy by this pneumatic mating display an edcook charges from the pack, joining the female in this dazzling dance, only to spend hours emitting guttural growls and loud burps to defend its prize from its only natural predator the chav. As day breaks the wide eyed, exhausted, but now triumphant edcook carries home its new mate only to leave the next day to once again join the pack on its next adventure.