What is Eltham?
1.
Home to the eldery, chavs and many misfits of society. Near to Sidcup, New Eltham and surrounded by schools like Beaverwood and Crown Woods it never stood much chance.
After you visit Eltham, you should probably test for a STI
'You live in Eltham? O dear. So you have a dealer then?'
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2.
A town that started out well, having been host to many of the Kings and Queens of England (google Eltham Palace) which fell into disrepair in the 90s. Now 85% of residients are either chavs or old people.
Did you see that gang war in Eltham the other day? Those old people got those chavs good.
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