What is Elvirus?
1.
The disease that infects dorm rooms at campuses around the country inhabited by sketchy, creeper roommates who enjoy their Eminem a little too loud. Symptoms are noted by a distinct smell similar to when a person does not shower for long periods of time and the characteristic of being extremely awkward. The Elvirus has no known cure, despite the constant efforts of world-renowned scientists. The only hope for the innocent victims whose room is infected is to send the original cause back to the homeland.
I thought I was going to enjoy college until my room got infected with the Elvirus.
Despite the constant use of Lysol and Febreeze, the main symptom of the Elvirus, the distinct smell, cannot be terminated.
Little Timmy: "One day, I hope to find a cure for the Elvirus."
Father: "It's hopeless Timmy, run away while you still can."
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