What is Emperor Pig?
1.
The pig of all pigs. This pig has the ability to destroy an army of 19000 of every species of the planet within half a second using the hair's on it's face as high powered lasers. It's filthy attitude makes it a very unpleasant creture to be around, excepting the fact that if you find it (which is a 1 in 383624892423908462390486 chance) it will give you the top 20000 things you want instantly. It also has the ability to travel between glaxies and universes using the fans on it's knees.
Stupid Child 1 - "What would you ask for from the emperor pig?"
Stupid Child 2 - "2000 Apples covered with custard"
Smart Child - "Don't ask me, im not stupid enough to list them all"
See