What is Epic Tense?
1.
1. A verb tense expressing epicness
2. Usage of archaic verbs to impart a sense of majesty or grand scale
3. A rebuttal used against Grammar Nazis with parade-pissingly bad timing
"No problems, my friend. It shall be done."
"Don't you mean it wil-"
"Epic tense. Shut the fuck up."
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While getting a lumpkin (getting a blow job while taking a shit) you simply get up and shove the lumpkin givers face into the toliet giv..