What is Eyepatchcandy?
1.
Displeasing to the eyes; repulsive;
the opposite of eyecandy. Someone unattractive-looking, sometimes even so ugly they have to compensate with a really really really nice personality.
"You are not so much eyecandy as you are eyepatchcandy, my ugly friend/Micheal Jackson."
See
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A large breasted woman who can wipe her ass with her own hooters
Cindy knocked me over with her unfun bags
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1.
When a man has sex with a woman in any "animal" style.
"I took her home and zooplankter."
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