Fairfax County

What is Fairfax County?


1.

As the anchor county of Northern Virginia with a population of over 1,000,000, it is the wealthiest county in terms of household income in the entire country. Many individuals from across the country and world move to Fairfax despite its expensive cost of living, because apparently, other counties and cities in the DC area are either too far from their jobs (i.e. Loudoun and Prince William Counties), or are just too crappy to live in (i.e. nearly anywhere in Maryland). It is nationally known for its extensive federal and high-tech jobs, as well as its landmark malls and shopping centers (Springfield Mall, Fair Oaks Mall, Reston Town Center) and mega shopping centers (Tysons Corner), which are popular shopping areas for tourists but are mostly used by local teens and adults to kill time. Fairfax also has some of the nation's best public schools, although it'll find anything to take the day off, from an inch of snow to no AC. And Fairfax has some of the country's worst traffic, which usually occurs from from 4 am to 1 am the following morning. Fairfax (as well as the rest of Northern Virginia) is the usual target of Richmond and its GOP in refusing transportation and other financial funding for the region, all of this while Northern Virginia tax dollars are used to fund roads and schools in trailer parks of southwestern VA. This is because the state's GOP know any growth from the result of funding will make Virginia a solid blue state. Fairfax also stands out as it is very racially diverse, but unlike our neighbor state to the north, everyone can actually get the f*ck along. This has resulted in many interracial couples to appear (besides White men and Asian or Indian women - thank God!) and a county proposed, but failed plan (thanks to Richmond, again) to give IR marriage couples extra tax breaks. Certain individuals who live in Fairfax County include many White nationalities, Koreans and Chinese, various African immigrants, Central American immigrants, Military personnel, high-tech geeks, preps, yuppies, stoners, emos, goths, the whitest black people (Oreos), the blackest Asian people (Chiggers), and others.

(Example of a debate in the Virginia General Assembly)

Tim Kaine: Now we need to find a solution to the traffic problem in Northern Virginia. Any Ideas?

Richmond GOP fag: Over my dead body I'll allow funding for Fairfax County to build the Silver Line to Dulles and through Tysons Corner.

Northern Virginian Rep.: That's all right. Watch in November how Fairfax alone will give Obama Virginia. And in 2009, my region will throw you and the rest of George Allen's butt-buddies out of Richmond.

See northern virginia, fcps, mount vernon, springfield, reston, herndon, lorton, burke, chantilly, centreville

2.

throwing up in the parking lot of mcdonalds

amanda fairfax county'd last night! gross! and gloriously sexual! yes! thank you!

See vomit, alabama hot pocket, jew, poop, pope, vagina, cunt, sarcasm, ms13, gangster, mazel tov

3.

The worst place to live. Rich fucks who drive fancy cars and don't give a shit about anything but themselves. Asshole little high school kids who think the universe revolves around them. An abundance of spoiled little brats who waste their parents' money on drugs, clothing from expensive stores, and other meaningless items. Every day a new street appears with a stupid new name. And a new shopping center appears so bitchy women in their 20's can go out and be superficial together. It's all about how dumb you can be, how much money you can make, how much nice land you can destroy with your developments, and how rude you can be to those who are supposedly inferior. I'm not sure how anyone in Fairfax County can be happy. Because all the men have tiny penises and the women are superficial and lack brains. Like I said, the worst place to live.

Moron from Northern Virginia: Hi! I'm a pathetic loser!

Normal Person: Maybe you should pull your head out of your ass and stop living in fairfax!

Moron: Wow, you use your brain?!

Fuck Fairfax County and it's degradation of humanity.

See northern virginia, chantilly, fairfax, nova, oakton high school


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