What is Fat Top?
1.
A hairstyle, much like the flat top, made popular by ND head coach Charlie Weis. The fat top is a flat top worn by a really disgusting, fat, sweaty, mess of a guy. There is nothing worse than a fat guy with a flat top. Bryant Reeves, a shitty basketball player in the late 90's, known as "the big country," had the greatest fat top in NBA history, narrowly defeating Greg "the fag" Ostertag in his Utah Jazz heyday. Walter Sobchak, John Goodman's character in the movie "The Big Lebowski," was recently awarded the greatest fat top in cinema history by the American Film Institute. 72% of men with fat-tops cannot see their dick without using multiple well-placed mirrors.
ND cafeteria worker: "Hey coach, how are you?"
Coach Weis: "I'm great, I'll have my usual."
ND cafeteria worker: "the punch bowl of beef gravy with 2 pounds of bacon and a bag of cheese on top?"
Coach Weis: "yeah, and a diet coke."
ND cafeteria worker: "Good luck this weekend coach, oh, and nice fat top."
Coach Weis: (muffled, pouring bowl into face while still in line) "thank you"
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