What is Feltching?
1.
"When a man fucks you up the butt without a rubber. He shoots his load, and then plants his mouth on your anus and sucks out his own warm sperm, plus whatever lubricant and feces are present. That's fletching. It may or may not, include kissing you to pass the sperm and fecal matter into your mouth." -Invisible Monsters by Chuck Palahniuk
"Feltching makes me want to puke."
See
2.
1) the act of a man retrieving his semen from someone else's anal cavity via an auxiliary device, typically a straw, and then either consuming it or orally passing it on to his partner.
2) the act of inserting a small rodent through a tube into one's anus and blowing crack through said tube, exciting the animal's brain to abnormal levels of activity causing it to have repeated muscle spasms and in doing so give the feltcher great pleasure.
1) i found my uncle feltching his friend in an elevator.
2) it is important to shine a bright light into the anus to draw the rodent out in case it OD's.
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3.
(Verb) Comes from Western Colorado slang insults. It refers to a man who drinks cum out of another's ass with a straw.
(Adjective) An insult for someone who shocks you with their stupidity or aura of annoyance.
Guy 1: "Dude, I think Gnar Kill is like the greatest band ever."
Guy 2: "You are such a feltcher man."
4.
To remove sexual fluids from partners anus via sucking or licking
After Brad's magnum size penis finished in my ass, he began feltching his load out of it.
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5.
1) Gay men who use allegedly gerbils in their anal sex. The gerbil is supposed to asphyxiate and the death spasms are considered pleasurable. Possibly meant as an allegory on the supposed selfishness of Gays.
2) Man who drinks cum out of anothers ass.
3) A process used by (medeival) blacksmiths of dipping heated metal from a forge repeatedly in water to facilitate fast casting/tempering.
org.estern America
An Unlikely Urban Legend has Richard Gere as a frequent hospital bound victim of feltching accidents.
After Fletching, followed by more Anal Sex, the Gerbil was pushed above <insert celebrity here>'s rectal Shelf and could only be removed at a hospital.
6.
The process of inserting a gerbil through a tube that is connected to ones ass hole. The gerbil then goes inside the anus. When the gerbil is desired to exit, the tube is inserted back into the anus and a light is shined into the tube attracting the gerbil out of the anus.
That gerbil is so brown it looks like it was being feltched.
