Fishturds

What is Fishturds?


1.

“Fishturds” are a precipitate (created from supersaturation and not a chemical reaction) commonly found in bottled beverages that have been given time to settle. They are mainly composed of sugar and food dye. Just like snowflakes, no two fishturds are alike and they often appear as small clumps of green-brown nast(hence their name). As the beverage bottle is gently shaken, the fishturd muckat the bottom will start to float about in a similar fashion to siltin a pond. The removal of fishturds, and the consequent remedy of the ugly appearance of the drink, is easy; simply shake the bottle. Persons afflicted with Parkinson’s may never know their drink had once contained the sugar clots. Additionally, persons known to have seizures may be asked to hold their friend’s Sobebefore it is opened, providing a suitable cover can be installed over the drink to prevent it from shattering and inflicting further injury upon the involuntarily break-dancing friend.

Ben: Goddamnit, my Sobe has fishturds in it. I'm not drinking this crap!

Torres: Man, you don't spend enough time out on the road! It's just sugar and junk. Shake it and you'll be fine.

See sobe, muck, nast, silt, turds, precipitate, sugar

2.

/noun/ (fîsh-tûrds)

“Fishturds” are a precipitate (created from supersaturation and not a chemical reaction) commonly found in bottled beverages that have been given time to settle. They are mainly composed of sugar and food dye. Just like snowflakes, no two fishturds are alike and they often appear as small clumps of green-brown nast(hence their name). As the beverage bottle is gently shaken, the fishturd muckat the bottom will start to float about in a similar fashion to siltin a pond. The removal of fishturds, and the consequent remedy of the ugly appearance of the drink, is easy; simply shake the bottle. Persons afflicted with Parkinson’s may never know their drink had once contained the sugar clots. Additionally, persons known to have seizures may be asked to hold their friend’s Sobebefore it’s open, providing a suitable cover can be installed over the drink to prevent it from shattering and inflicting further injury upon the involuntarily break-dancing friend.

Ben: Goddamnit, my Sobe has fishturds in it. I'm not drinking this crap!

Torres: Man, you don't spend enough time out on the road! It's just sugar and junk. Shake it and you'll be fine.

See sobe, arizona, muck, nast, silt, turds, precipitate, sugar


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