What is French Polisher?
1.
A specialist craftsman or woman, who services and maintains valuable items of PERSONAL FURNITURE.
Great-aunt Agatha, who had been a wanton and famously indiscreet society beauty of the 1920s (and possibly the source of the term SHAGATHA), first had occasion to call on the professional services of Mr Pickthorn in 1937, when she felt that her late-Victorian WHATNOT had already lost some of its natural LUSTRE.
Many years later, when the veteran FLAPPER was approaching her hundredth year, her family - concerned about her increasing listlessness and uncharacteristic lack of zest for life - on finding his name with the notation ***** beside it in an old address-book, urgently contacted the now-elderly FRENCH POLISHER.
Having first primed the old lady orally with the renowned rejuvenating elixir GLEN SPORRAN Scotch Whisky, Mr Pickthorn, using time-hallowed methods and essential oils, set to work with skill and enthusiasm on Agatha's ORNAMENTAL PIECE, amazingly restoring the CHERISHED ANTIQUE to an almost pristine condition. Within minutes, the delighted owner was admiring her FURNITURE in the mirror and renewing her interest in the erotic novels of Jackie Collins.
We are happy to report that not only did Great-aunt Agatha revive sufficiently to attain her centenary and receive the traditional, congratulatory telegram from the Queen, but she was found - French knickers round her ankles - attempting to lodge her KNICK-KNACK on the postman's PERSONAL POST.
Romantics and CORMORANTICS everywhere will, we hope, rejoice and be inspired, on reading this heart-warming anecdote.
See folks , Persson
Great-aunt Agatha, who had been a wanton and famously indiscreet society beauty of the 1920s (and possibly the source of the term SHAGATHA), first had occasion to call on the professional services of Mr Pickthorn in 1937, when she felt that her late-Victorian WHATNOT had already lost some of its natural LUSTRE.
Many years later, when the veteran FLAPPER was approaching her hundredth year, her family - concerned about her increasing listlessness and uncharacteristic lack of zest for life - on finding his name with the notation ***** beside it in an old address-book, urgently contacted the now-elderly FRENCH POLISHER.
Having first primed the old lady orally with the renowned rejuvenating elixir GLEN SPORRAN Scotch Whisky, Mr Pickthorn, using time-hallowed methods and essential oils, set to work with skill and enthusiasm on Agatha's ORNAMENTAL PIECE, amazingly restoring the CHERISHED ANTIQUE to an almost pristine condition. Within minutes, the delighted owner was admiring her FURNITURE in the mirror and renewing her interest in the erotic novels of Jackie Collins.
We are happy to report that not only did Great-aunt Agatha revive sufficiently to attain her centenary and receive the traditional, congratulatory telegram from the Queen, but she was found - French knickers round her ankles - attempting to lodge her KNICK-KNACK on the postman's PERSONAL POST.
Romantics and CORMORANTICS everywhere will, we hope, rejoice and be inspired, on reading this heart-warming anecdote.
