What is Gear-happy?
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One who is overly enthusiastic for technological advantage derived from equipment, accessories, or wardrobe, especially in one who's underlying fundamental proficiency is clearly lacking.
"Besides price, my main hesitation (in sporting a Speedo LZR Racer Swimsuit a la Multi-Gold Medalist Olympian Michael Phelps) would be looking like a gear-happy jackass on the pool deck at a meet." -- Sara Dickerman, writing for Slate on Wednesday, Aug. 6, 2008
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Masturbation. Called zero-to-three because that's how many times you do it per day.
Alright guys, I'm going home to zero-to-..