What is Guidance Counselor?
1.
A particularly lame and moronic adult that spends most of the day patronizing unhappy children/teenagers while under the delusion that they are making the world a better place. Except in very rare cases, they usually end up screwing kids more than helping them. Tend to smile too much. Approach with caution.
Mrs McKay, the middle school guidance counselor, smiled at the distraught young boy and, instead of giving him any useful advice, told him to just ignore the kids that threw trash at him on a daily basis. Then she gave him an animal cracker and asked how many guns he had at home.
2.
A person employed in the field of Education who drinks a shit load of coffee and pisses off the teachers in his/her school by sitting at his/her desk all day surfing the net, drinking coffee and talking on the phone while they have to deal with 30+ unruly brats all day. Often times this person is a former teacher who had zero classroom control and realized that they could get the best of both worlds (summers off, out the door by 3pm and not have to deal with kids) by going to Graduate School and becoming a Guidance Counselor.
After walking by a classroom of 30 unruly 2nd graders, the Guidance Counselor walked into his office, closed the door, poured himself a cup of coffee, called his girlfriend, logged onto the internet, turned the radio on, leaned back in his chair and said, "this is the life!".
