What is Hautian Hoochie?
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ho-SHIN HOOCH-ee –noun
A class of female currently residing in Terre Haute, Indiana, usually between the ages of 16 and 24. They can be identified by their enthusiastic use of facial cosmetics, skin which is tanned to an excessive degree, and an IQ approximately equal to that of the Hexaprotodon Liberiensis, otherwise known as the Pygmy Hippopotamus.
(Note: Upon exceeding their expiration date, the female will increase in bodily volume at an exponential rate.)
Mark: "Dude! check out the basket of buns at 2 o'clock"
Winston: "The specimen in question appears to be a Hautian Hoochie. I would advise the classic 'Pump then Jump' maneuver."
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"You don't have any speckled birds, do you? You know, L.A. turnarounds, uppers?"
-Tom Frank, in Nashville..
