What is Howard County?
1.
Howard County, or “hoco,” well-known for being one of the richest counties in the country, let alone Maryland and rightfully so. The inhabitants of Howard County run the gammut from your typical preppy upper middle class group to your white trash lower to middle class wannabe-black group, and one can't forget the overwhelming population of asian and middle-eastern Howard Countians, only half of whom can actually speak English....as for the preppy group, most of the mothers are either the stay at home yuppie soccer moms who cart their brat kids around for a living or the working moms who have enough money for a nanny and daily presents from toys-r-us but not enough time to actually sit down and god forbid raise their own children, not to mention dad who's either away on business (someone's gotta make the money to provide for the minivan/suv payments, the mortgage on the huge house, and of course mom's nails and wardrobe) or home and carting the kiddies around with mom, dressed to the nines in polo and tommy, sporting those obnoxiously expensive boat shoes. These types can be found mostly in Ellicott City and Clarksville. As for the white trash Howard Countians, who you know are not contributing to the county’s economic esteem, they can be found in places like Elkridge and Laurel, the breeding grounds for white kids who think they’re black, fashion trends such as the mullet, big bangs, and huge white t-shirts are prevalent here. Howard Countians living in these areas listen to either rap or country, one or the other, never both, and never anything else, and can be seen racing down Route 1 in their pickup trucks or shitty excuses for cars. The Asian Invasion that’s currently taken over Howard County can been seen in the overload of souped-up Honda Civics and the appearance of masses of young asian students either at the library (definitely not studying) or hanging around the “pool hall.” Young Asians are either obnoxious bookworms from very disciplined families where they’ll get screamed at and pressured unless they achieve at least a 4.5 or “ghetto” members of the Asian mafia, sporting more hair gel than one bottle contains and wearing more ice than the “ghetto” black kids. The Asian parents are well-known for being the slowest drivers in the ENTIRE WORLD. This, ladies and gentlemen, is Howard County at its best and it will never change, I guarantee it, so embrace it or MOVE.
if you live here, chances are you'll never leave, it's just one of those places..
2.
Howard County, or “hoco,” well-known for being one of the richest counties in the country, let alone Maryland and rightfully so. The inhabitants of Howard County run the gammut from your typical preppy upper middle class group to your white trash lower to middle class wannabe-black group, and one can't forget the overwhelming population of asian and middle-eastern Howard Countians, only half of whom can actually speak English....as for the preppy group, most of the mothers are either the stay at home yuppie soccer moms who cart their brat kids around for a living or the working moms who have enough money for a nanny and daily presents from toys-r-us but not enough time to actually sit down and god forbid raise their own children, not to mention dad who's either away on business (someone's gotta make the money to provide for the minivan/suv payments, the mortgage on the huge house, and of course mom's nails and wardrobe) or home and carting the kiddies around with mom, dressed to the nines in polo and tommy, sporting those obnoxiously expensive boat shoes. These types can be found mostly in Ellicott City and Clarksville. As for the white trash Howard Countians, who you know are not contributing to the county’s economic esteem, they can be found in places like Elkridge and Laurel, the breeding grounds for white kids who think they’re black, fashion trends such as the mullet, big bangs, and huge white t-shirts are prevalent here. Howard Countians living in these areas listen to either rap or country, one or the other, never both, and never anything else, and can be seen racing down Route 1 in their pickup trucks or shitty excuses for cars. The Asian Invasion that’s currently taken over Howard County can been seen in the overload of souped-up Honda Civics and the appearance of masses of young asian students either at the library (definitely not studying) or hanging around the “pool hall.” Young Asians are either obnoxious bookworms from very disciplined families where they’ll get screamed at and pressured unless they achieve at least a 4.5 or “ghetto” members of the Asian mafia, sporting more hair gel than one bottle contains and wearing more ice than the “ghetto” black kids. The Asian parents are well-known for being the slowest drivers in the ENTIRE WORLD. This, ladies and gentlemen, is Howard County at its best and it will never change, I guarantee it, so embrace it or MOVE.
if you live here, chances are, you'll never leave, that's just the kind of place it is
3.
where theres always nothing happening somewhere.
Howard County is in Maryland
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4.
Howard County is one the most wealthy counties in Maryland and one of the top in the nation. Known as "Hoco," the majority of people that make up the county are lax players, including the #1 ranked team in the nation for the past 6 years from Mt.Hebron. Other recognitions include: Ellicott City and Columbia which were both ranked in the top 25 places to live in the US, along with the county being nominated as "Sportstown USA" by Sports illustrated in 2004, and ranked as one of the top counties in public schools in the nation. Most residents are upper-middle class yuppies, however you do find your "ghetto" areas. But then again, compared to some other places, our ghetto looks pretty good. There's definitely a lot of diversity too, especially with the "asian invasion." Most parents in the county both work, but the stay at home moms are the soccer moms that show up to their kids games wearing designer clothes and ready to scream until they lose their voices. The top schools in sports are Riverhill, Mt. Hebron, Centennial and Glenelg, but with two new schools built in the past 3 years, redistricting might change those dynasties. Although the kids are all jaded by the Columbia Mall, the Howard County Fair, and whatever else there is to do there, you're guaranteed to get drunk or high any weekend you want.
Lax rules the county, all the kids try to satisfy their boredom, you know if you're from Howard County, you're gonna end up living here...its just that kinda place
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5.
The East Coast equivalent of Beverly Hills, California.
-Is that Paris Hilton at Bare Bones?
*Dear God, I hope she isn't moving to howard county.
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6.
As said before goes by HoCo to most us kids living here....not gonna go into the details of being rich and great schools/sports. Heres a new definition: Howard County the most stereotypical place on earth.
Everything living breathing or even a building is given some sort of little name and descroption to it
lets go with Schools for instance
River Hill- hated by many schools for some reason because thy think of the studens there are all snobby rich kids
Oakland Mills- the "ghetto" of Hoco
Mt. hebron- with amzaing lax but bad reo for many drug "issues"
many others along with those
the truth is with schools the residents, EVERYTHING here is given a label when really we are not all what we think each other is. soo lets stop being hated by eevryone else and stop encouraging the stereotypes.
Howard County howard county howard county
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7.
Howard County is ranked as one of the richest counties in the United States. Many cities being ranked in the best small cities/towns in the United States as well. Its place where the only good hang outs are the Columbia Mall, and occasionally the Lakefront if you are pushed to extremes. A place that if you attend highschool there you most likely have hated Long Reach - which was okay because if you went to Long Reach you pretty much hated everyone else twice as much. A place where the only thing you hate more than Long Reach or River Hill is Montgomery County.
A major attraction in Howard County is Merriweather Post Pavillion. A venue that everyone has been to at least once and if not you are given a stare like you are an alien. Chances are you probably applied to, if not worked, there before.
Most inhabitants of Howard County often find their summer days either spent planning to visit or actually visiting Ocean City, where on any day you can look down the beach and see 50 people that you've seen aimlessly walking around the mall - maybe you even saw them purchase that horrible bathing suit.
A common conversation during the summer in Howard County
Jessica: Oh my god. I am so bored there is nothing to do
Heather: I know, right? Want to go to the mall this weekend or something?
Jessica: We are here right now. Lets go to Ocean City, that girl we pretend to like can probably drive us. Shes a total sucker.
Stranger: I couldnt help but overhear, but I'm going to Ocean City this weekend to what a coincidence.
Another Stranger who the stranger doesnt even know: Did you guys just say your going to Ocean City? Thats so funny, I am too! Maybe I'll see you guys there.
I think you get the picture.
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