What is In The Crawl Space?
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The closeted virgin's analog to a gay person's "in the closet". "Crawl space" because it's an even smaller and oft forgotten room in the house, thus being a virgin is even more ignoble than being gay. Also apt for virgins because "crawl" is descriptive of a virgin's infant state of sexuality.
Cal: You know, Andy just spent ten minutes telling me how he spent all Friday night making egg salad, because he had a craving for an egg salad sandwich.
Jay: That's weird man, cause what's a guy doin' making egg salad on a Friday night? Aw crap! You think he's a virgin?!! You think he's...in the crawl space?!
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getting a blowjob in a movie theater
"dude, howd your date go?" "oh mannn, we went to this scary movie so she was all gr..
