What is Iowa City?
1.
Simply put, the best town in the world home to the best state U in the world, the
Ned: hey Jim, you should come back to Iowa with me and hang out this weekend
Jim: f*ck Iowa
Ned: no it's alright, I live in Iowa City.
later that weekend in Iowa City
Ned: see?
Jim: (awed silence)
2.
If you havent been here for a Hawkeye game, or spent a weekend at the bars, you know nothing of it..... Iowa City has the biggest bar in the Big 10, and is renowned everywhere in the midwest. beware though, the 5-0 are a bunch of a$$holes, and because there's so much fun and underage drinking, they employ QUITE a force. If you're getting drunk downtown just remember to wear your sleeves long so they (cops) cant see your lack of wristband. Other than that there are 40,000 kids ready for whatever and Playboy Magazine nominated Burge Residential dorm the top 10 places to get laid in America in 95. if you can keep your head on straight and balance a lot of fun with hard work, you'll be 'A' okay.. if not... you'll probably drop out, but not before the best semester of your life....
blasted, f-ed up, smashed, herky, liberal iowa, homefront, Iowa City is the greatest place.... in the midwest
See
3.
Arguably the coolest college town in the Midwest, with only Madison WI rivalling it. Basically a suburb of Chicago, whom IC owes much of its population base (especially UI student body) and culture to. Septembers in IC are gorgeous, and Iowa football fans are as loyal and raucous as they come.
FACT: Iowa City has the highest percentage of people with college degrees in the world.
See
4.
iowa city were its okay to drink a lot but its better to be an alcoholic. with so many bars how can you not always be drunk. fac really come on that just means get drunk after class pass out for a few hours and wake up and do it up again. the magic bus...well need i say more... IC and be summed up as the greatest place ever. no hurricans can ever happen, and even if they did, we would probably all be too damn drunk to noice...well unless our beer wasnt cold.
dont knock it before you try it, you'll love it.
21 shots for you birthday..alright sweet
21 pitchers oh no those are gone get an other card what your on cared 25 and there are only 10 people drinking them dude alright new record.. iowa city is a beer drinkers heaven.
See
5.
Southeastern Iowa town home to the University of Iowa (which has the dubious distinction of being one of the top party schools in the nation, which translates to drunken assholes falling all over each other and vomiting), rich girls from Chicago who fake bake until they glow orange, and alcoholism. Your first three years in Iowa City will be spent partying until you drink so much you start having DTs in class, and then you will drop out and start working at Procter and Gamble. After you realize that Iowa City is nothing but a really fun college town, and every asshole is the same, you will start running away (only to run into Cedar Rapids which is shittier and smells like oats).
You can look forward to football traffic in the fall along with drunken assholes who commit every campus crime in the book. The first snow never gets plowed off of the road and since salt doesn't work in -40 degrees, they don't bother laying it.
Snobby artsy emo types, spoiled Chicagoans and douchey jocks with beer bellies welcome.
Amid the bars in the ped mall (in downtown Iowa City), after ISU/Iowa game:
UI Student: Hawkeyes rule!
ISU Student: No way, Clones rule!
UI mob: Fuck you, asshole! ::drunkenly beats the everloving shit out of ISU student::
See
6.
A gay place to go to get drunk. Really the only reason to go there is so you can get into the bars. If you are a girl however, you will get raped. There is no question. The fucking dirty ass people of Iowa City are only good for fucking girls who dont want to be fucked. Try finding your way around too, you will get lost, because the layout of the entire city is just shit.
"lets go to iowa city to get drunk!"
"hell no you will get raped!"
"o thats true"
See
7.
City of Assholes. Door mat of the big 10. Lost to Northwestern, UNI, and ISU all in the same year. Biggest sore losers and biggest sore winners known to college sports. Basically the worst fans in the world! If you resemble these assholes in any way do everyone else a favor and cleanse the world of your dirty seed.
Iowa city 1 mile
Next sign of intelligence (Ames) 138 miles
See