What is Johns Hopkins University?


1.

A prestigious research university located in Baltimore, Maryland, that is known for its medical school and its medical research programs. That is the JHU that the world recognizes.

However prestigious its medical programs may be, or perhaps due to it, the female populace at this institution resemble Bonobo monkeys. Instead of the normal 1~10 normal scale that is used to describe their physical beauty, Hopkins females go into a different ranking system called HIV (Hopkins Impared Vision) where the 1~10 scale lies somewhere around -7~3 on the normal scale. (Negative scales reflect the rating you'd give the person had you been ranking males)

Conversation

Person A: I graduated from Hopkins and met my wife there

Person B: She must be butt fucking ugly

2.

Definition 1 above is very well done. Hopkins is a great academic facility both undergraduate and graduate. However, The females that attended this prestigious academic facility are hideous with the exception of very few, which can be counted using a rudimentary abacus. Although Bonobo monkeys will be offended by the comparison made above, it is the definite truth. Whereas definition definition 1 is completely true, definition 2 is a bold faced lie. It was clearly written to make girls at JHU feel better about themselves. Clearly, they are the only ones that gave it a thumbs up. If you are looking for a truly hot girl at Hopkins you are an idiot.

Conversation between two male Johns Hopkins University students

Person A: Are there any good parties tonight?

Person B: There's a party but girls from other schools aren't coming.

Person A: What movie are we watching tonight?

See abacus, college, hot girls

3.

A prestigious university located in Baltimore, Maryland more affectionately known as B-more. Its female population is far more attractive than its male counterpart whose average beauty ranking hovers somewhere around a 3, with the exception of the lacrosse team.

Person A: Where do you go to school?

Person B: Johns Hopkins University.

Person A: Oh are you going to be a doctor?

Person B: No, I'm majoring in philosophy.

See college, university


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