What is Jonas?
1.
Life its self, also the new god.
Jonas is life, or oh my jonas!
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2.
A uncommon name.
Although now commonly used in band names.
Often mispelled or misunderstood
Me: You listen to that song by Weezer? Its called My Name Is Jonas
You: Wtf?
In-And-Out worker: What is your name?
Jonas: Jonas
In-And-Out worker: Jones...Joe?, your order is ready!
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3.
Jonas is a Latin common but well-known name.
He's nice, attractive, intelligent, thoughtful, gorgeous, friendly and has a good sense of humor.
Even though he doesn't think so, he's a strong personality and can deal with problems.
Person 1: What's your name?
Jonas: My name is Jonas.
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4.
Derived from Yonah (Hebrew meaning "Dove" or Sign of God, and also means 'The Doer') and translated through the Greek Ionas to the present Jonas. The Lithuanian name Jonas was independently derived from the name 'John' which means either a client of prostitutes or a device you sit on to crap.
Also a namesake book in the old testament depicting a prophet's involuntary ingurgitation by gigantic marine wildlife as part of a divine motivational technique program.
Also a reason for screaming adolescent girls to wet their drawers, and for lame rock bands to write mediocre songs in sappy 3/4 time signatures.
(The Doer) "You see that girl, I'd like to Jonas."
(The Dove) (In the shower( "Honey, do we have another bar of Jonas under the sink?"
(Sign of God) "I neglected to read the Jonas on the freeway and missed my exit to the Billy Graham talk."
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5.
The name given to a widely popular boy-band who have billions of screaming and crying over-fanatic fans. Usually used in the tween group expressions.
"Oh My Jonas"
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6.
Poop
Poop = Jonas
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7.
The Disney Channel show that depicts a fake life of the uber-losers,
Do not watch.
I can't believe Disney let me down like that. I will never watch JONAS again. Thanks for wasting 30 minutes of my life.
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