What is Jorsked?
1.
A state of being induced by consumption of mass quantities of Majorska Vodka. Consists of serious delusions of sobriety, where one thinks and feels as though they are completely sober, to go as far even as feeling a sort of "divine" sobriety, which allows them a conceived "better" understanding of situations and "the way things are." In reality, to any third party observer, the "Jorsked" one appears too hammered to even be walking, never mind using his newfound "mystical insight" to solve the problems of the world, or whatever warped crap the individual can dream up. Upon pointing this out, however, one will quickly face heated retaliation from the Jorsked beast. The resistance usually occurs in three stages:
1) denial (the Jorsked one claims to be sober)
2) anger (the Jorsked is furious you would doubt them)
3) violence, laughter, or tears (the Jorsked beast will break into one of the emotional directions, and break hard)
4) This fourth state is optional, and only for those experienced in advanced Majorska usage. The 4th stage is JAIL. Many advanced Jorskers (750ml drank by one person or more) end up in jail. Usually, they are just in the wrong place at the wrong time, but regardless, are too drunk to coherently explain to the police officer that spots them why they shouldn't be in jail .. so off they go, to the surprise (or maybe not) of all your friends in the morning. {"Dibs not bailing him out THIS time! It's someone else's turn!"}
The aforementioned brand, and only the aforementioned brand (and it's triple crown) is known to induce this mystical, almost unreal, state of being.
Caution: A Majorska lover can become overly protective of his supply of the swill. Borrow with caution -- or swift, thoughtless violence can result.
...Yes, it will make a new man out of you - and he wants some too.
"Man, I just drank a fifth (750ml) of Majorska all by myself. I'm so Jorsked, but I know I'm good to drive."
"Look at that guy. What the hell is wrong with him? He can't even speak, never mind walk, but he's still drinking... Oh, he must be Jorsked."
"Man, we were walking home last night, and Samit was RIGHT behind us. Next thing I know, it's 6am, and I'm getting phone calls to bail his ass out. Fucking prick was so Jorsked, he got arrested again!"
"Upon approaching the Jorsked individual, nothing but a spew of jibberish, drewl, and laughter was emitted from his mouth. His response was the same no matter what the stimuli, that is, however, until you told him he was drunk. That's when the violence started. But then he realized he was your best friend -- put the knife away, and cried, like a little girl. Life is so cruel, Ryan... SO cruel!"
Happy Jorsking :)
See
2.
A state of being induced by consumption of mass quantities of Majorska Vodka. Consists of serious delusions of sobriety, where one thinks and feels as though they are completely sober, to go as far even as feeling a sort of "divine" sobriety, which allows them better understanding of situations and "the way things are." In reality, to any third party observer, the "Jorsked" one appears too hammered to even be walking. Upon pointing this out, however, one will quickly face retaliation from the Jorsked beast.
The aforementioned brand, and only the aforementioned brand (and it's triple crown) is known to induce this mystical, almost unreal, state of being.
"Man, I just drank a fifth (750ml) of Majorska all by myself. I'm so Jorsked, but I know I'm good to drive."
"Look at that guy. What the hell is wrong with him? He can't even speak, never mind walk, but he's still drinking... Oh, he must be Jorsked."
See
3.
A state of being induced by consumption of mass quantities of Majorska Vodka. Consists of serious delusions of sobriety, where one thinks and feels as though they are completely sober, to go as far even as feeling a sort of "divine" sobriety, which allows them a conceived "better" understanding of situations and "the way things are." In reality, to any third party observer, the "Jorsked" one appears too hammered to even be walking, never mind using his newfound "mystical insight" to solve the problems of the world, or whatever warped crap the individual can dream up. Upon pointing this out, however, one will quickly face heated retaliation from the Jorsked beast. The resistance usually occurs in three stages:
1) denial (the Jorsked one claims to be sober)
2) anger (the Jorsked is furious you would doubt them)
3) violence, laughter, or tears (the Jorsked beast will break into one of the emotional directions, and break hard)
The aforementioned brand, and only the aforementioned brand (and it's triple crown) is known to induce this mystical, almost unreal, state of being.
Caution: A Majorska lover can become overly protective of his supply of the swill. Borrow with caution -- or swift, thoughtless violence can result.
...Yes, it will make a new man out of you - and he wants some too.
"Man, I just drank a fifth (750ml) of Majorska all by myself. I'm so Jorsked, but I know I'm good to drive."
"Look at that guy. What the hell is wrong with him? He can't even speak, never mind walk, but he's still drinking... Oh, he must be Jorsked."
See
4.
A state of being induced by consumption of mass quantities of Majorska Vodka. Consists of serious delusions of sobriety, where one thinks and feels as though they are completely sober, to go as far even as feeling a sort of "divine" sobriety, which allows them better understanding of situations and "the way things are." In reality, to any third party observer, the "Jorsked" one appears too hammered to even be walking. Upon pointing this out, however, one will quickly face retaliation from the Jorsked beast.
The aforementioned brand, and only the aforementioned brand (and it's triple crown) is known to induce this mystical, almost unreal, state of being.
"Man, I just drank a fifth (750ml) of Majorska all by myself. I'm so Jorsked, but I know I'm good to drive."
"Look at that guy. What the hell is wrong with him? He can't even speak, never mind walk, but he's still drinking... Oh, he must be Jorsked."
See
