What is Kiss The Jesus?
1.
Catholic Church code phrase used by Priests whilst in the confessional instructing the unwary confessee to "Kiss the Jesus." This is always accompanied by the sound of a zipper coming down in a rapid manner and a loud, "BOING-ing" sound as the erect penis of the Priest, at the sight of a ten year old boy, pops out of his Cassock.
Gerald, Ten Year Old Boy: "Forgive me Father for I have sinned. It has been one week since my last confession."
Catholic Priest: "Say five Our Fathers and One Hail Mary and KISS THE JESUS."
<zip, BOING, followed by smooching noises>
