What is Knocking Shop Mattress?
1.
An effect of male pattern baldness,whereby the unfortunate male decides not to do the decent thing ie get the clippers out and grows the floundering folicles hoping to conceal the onset of nature by creative combing,suceeding only in an elaborate , threadbare shaping with a shiney(often sunburnt)beacon of scalp shining through for all to see.Resembling the aformentioned sex workers overused mattress.See Robin Gibb,Footballer Kenny Cunningham etc
See that Alan Shearer on Match of the Day,he's got a head like a knocking shop mattress,though his muscular pressence up front,will be sorely missed by Newcastle this season.
See
