Lakeland

What is Lakeland?


1.

Place where people go to die....

And theres nothing to do but shop at the abundance of Walmarts, Publixs Badcock, Home Depots, or Sonics....

1: So what do you want to do tonight?

2: I dunno whats to do in Lakeland?

1: Die.

See Brandi

2.

A place in Floridafrom which all evil in the Universe originates. It is the ominous spawning grounds of the deleterious Publix Corporation, hometown to murderer Ray Lewis, and the crappiest festival in the world, known as "Sun 'n' Fun."

Oh, and there's a lot of dumb emo kids around too.

Lakeland is the place where if you had a choice to live in Lakeland or North Dakota, you should pick North Dakota.

3.

Synonymous with dead end. The most god awful part of the greater western hemisphere, with the worst taxi service.

A typical saturday night in Lakeland consists of a)Publix Supermarkets or b)getting shit faced in some backwoods barnhouse

If you really hate yourself, you gotta check out Lakeland!

See dead end, hell, suicide, masochistic, dull, lame, boring, drab, ulala

4.

A small citish area in the middle of Florida. It has a lot of lakes, but not the most in the county. it was discovered by a guy named Munn a long time ago. There is not a huge amount to do, except go to the AMC (which is only $5.50, not the movies) and do large amount of nothing.

I hope you aren't going to Lakeland, it sucks.

5.

The most sophisticated rest stop in the eastern US. Located conveniently between Orlando and Tampa on I-4, and featuring numerous grocery stores and fast food chains, as well as several quality movie theaters, this little town appeared as a top-100 tourist attractins for 2005 in central-to-eastern florida, edging out disney world to make this prestigious list. see also bland, dull, emo, redneck,monotomy.

Hey, what do you say we stop in Lakeland to grab a sub from Publix and fill up on gas?

6.

A "city" in between Tampa and Orlando intersected by I4 which lacks in any originality and consists of only chain resturants and stores such as McDonalds and Waffle House. This is where Publix originated and is it's only claim to fame. The swan is Lakeland's symbol, no matter where you are in Lakeland, you can see a swan wether it be a real one being slaughtered by one of the local hicksor a statue of one colored or dressed to fit its particular location. Kau Kau Koner is a racist bar which is the only one in the area where you aren't as likely to be stabbed as the other shitty bars in the area. The reason for this is because it is the only one that the students of Florida Southern College can go to and make it back to school after a long nights drink. The downtown area is not entirely bad as long as you stay away from places such as Memorial Blvd, where you will be stampeded by homeless people morning, noon and night.

Thursday Night: "What do you want to do tonight?"

"Get drunk and go to Kaus"

Friday Night: "What do you want to do tonight?"

"Get drunk and go to Kaus"

Saturday Night: "What do you want to do tonight?"

"Get drunk and go to Kaus"

P.S. Don't go to Lakeland... Ever

See redneck, homeless, boring, racist, swan

7.

A psychiatric hospital in Springfield, MO...

A place where people under 18 are sent when they are fucked up or crazy...or are a 13 year old crack whore...

alot of lesbians..asians..and black people are the counselors

"Dude? What happened to Johnny"?

"Man...he molested some little kid when he was high on Xanax...they sent his ass to Lakeland!"

See missouri, crazy


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