What is Lampers?
1.
The term "Lampers" is given to a group or individual who socialise in a remote pub in the hills of hadfield called The New Lamp. Unlike most people who venture there due to their local connections, a lamper(s) stands out from the rest. Firstly, a lamper(s) is able to speak the correct english language with ease(alcohol excused). Secondly, a lamper(s) does not have a lazy eye(alcohol excused) and thirdly, a lampers mother is not also their sister. Many more reasons for a lamper(s) standing out from the rest of the locals go from not having webbed feat to having their own teeth!! If you happen to see a lamper or a group of lampers,please do not hesitate in approaching them, you will be greeted with NL love and probably even bought a drink!!
Locals in hadfield have hairy palms, Lampers do not!!
Everyone in hadfield is related in every which way thats wrong, Lampers are not!!
Locals in hadfield have 2 bellybuttons, Lampers are not!!
Locals in hadfield think you need a passport to venture to another town, Lampers do not!!
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