La-z-boy Ferret Crunch Edit Meaning

1.

The #1 cause of premature death for ferrets.

THIS IS NOT A JOKE.

HUSBAND: Hey, honey, have you seen Freddy the ferret?

WIFE: No, sugar, I haven't.

HUSBAND: I've been looking for him for an hour -- I don't know where he could be. Oh, well, I guess I'll just sit down and watch some ESPN.

(Sits down, everything is fine. Then reclines -- SqueeKRUNCH! Very sadly, the La-Z-boy ferret crunch has taken another ferret life before it's time.)

HUSBAND: Oh my God! It's Freddy! Dear God...

OZZY: Don't let this happen to you.

See chairs, kill, sleeping, ferrets