What is Leenold Schwartzencrander?
1.
A superhuman figure having qualities both man-like and mom-like. Able to sense the most miniscule disturbances within a garden space and capable of producing the most irrational logic known to mankind. Her or his goal: Ruining as many lives as inhumanly possible each day through a series of extremely organized agendas.
Did you hear about what Leenold Schwartzencrander did last night?
No, do share.
S/he was found driving a steel blue Toyota Sienna while carrying a shotgun and doing doughnuts in the middle of the high school football field. S/he was shooting every kid in sight.
Oh my God! The cops got her...or him, right?
Hell no. S/he had pre-arranged schedules for each of them so that none could be there to stop her or him. S/he's headed for the state line. Only God knows where s/he'll strike next!
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