Liquid Pizza

What is Liquid Pizza?


1.

noun: stomach contents; vomit; puke; barf; liquid laughs; liquid groceries; et al.

So called for the similarity of its visual texture and color palette to typical crappy frozen or national-chain, two-for-twenty-bucks, one-liter-free-coke delivery pizza. The viscous liquid base is the consistency and color of creamed corn, not dissimilar in appearance to the plastic milk protein-based synthetic goo intended to masquerade as cheese on the typical pizza. Suffused and suspended within can be nearly anything, usually unidentifiable inclusions or flecks of dark green, red or brown hue, or more rarely, black or dark gray.

Mandatory though, is the presence of mysterious solid pink chunks of God-only-knows what. Pepperoni perhaps? Ham? How about ground-up beef and pork sphincters, tantalizingly enhanced with FD&C Red Dye No 3? YUMMERS!

I'm such an assclown! I shouldn't have drunk that whole fifth of Drambuie. On the way home last night I sprayed liquid pizza all over the windshield and dashboard of my girlfriend's car! No blowjobs coming my way for a while!

See puke, barf, driving the porcelain bus


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