What is Lirpa?
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Lirpa : lêr-på; person whose epidermis absorbs sun like a sponge, resulting in a potato-like coating. Lirpa is indigenous to the Mid-west region of the United States, but has been known to migrate to the South-West region in order to maximize sun-exposure and search for possible mates. (AKA Ape Tits, A-petite, Shirpa, or Frank)
I think I'm gonna biggie-size my Lirpa!
-or-
Lirpa, hop in the oven and I will cover you with sourcream and chives.
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