What is Mallcow?
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Mallcows are clueless shoppers at suburban malls who are easily manipulated into paying for useless gadgets and superfluous fashion trends. Widely varying in age and demographics, mallcows include common suburban archetypes such as soccer moms, teeny boppers, and high school jocks.
"Oh, look, What Not To Wear got their hands on yet another mallcow...."
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When a girl has a hairy asscrack it is considered a fart marmot.
"Holy crap, when she bent over you could see her hairy fart marmo..