Mert 't Turt

What is Mert 't Turt?

1.

Large ginger peer. Has 'shoe brush' hair which is occasionally shaved to resemble a lesbian egg. Ginger humpty dumpty lesbo, average badminton player and average Pro Evo player who always plays as France or Arsenal, motorcar enthusiast. Has alarmingly red face like a smacked arse.

Mert 't Turt AKA Martyn Howard from Monmouthshire currently residing in Cheltenham.

The bathroom stinks!

Yeah, Mert 't Turt just layed a Cleveland Steamer in there!

See egg, lesbo, lesbian, humpty dumpty
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