What is Minesweeper?
1.
The best game ever. Nearly every Windows user ignores this game because it's "too hard." But once you get into it, you will become addicted and obsessed immediately. For those of you ignorant bastards who think the game's too hard to learn, read below.
The rules are simple: You want to uncover all the "safe" cells without clicking a cell containing a mine. When you click, you'll inevitably see numbers. Each number (1-8) represents the number of mines adjacent to that cell. Using logic, you can determine where the safe cells and mines are. Left-click all the safe cells to win.
If you think there's a mine under a square, you may right-click it (to "flag" it) for reference, though this is uneeded. The only benefit of doing such is to use the left-right clicking trick. If you click both buttons simultaneously over an uncovered cell that has all of its adjacent mines flagged, it will automatically uncover the remaining mines to save time. However, when you get really fast, this is also uneeded. With enough skill, you'll find you can solve a board by only left-clicking much faster than you would using the flags.
Newbies should start with the Beginner board until they've beaten it a few times, preferably under 30 seconds. Then they should get used to Intermediate and eventually, Expert.
After playing it for a half a year, it's no longer a game of logic, it's a game of "How fast can I move and click the mouse?" At this point, you should be able to beat an expert game without ever thinking once and still complete it under 100 seconds.
It's fun as hell to show off to your friends how fast you can win a game. Go play it now.
Ashley: Hey, what are your minesweeper high schores again?
Phil: 2/25/89 (Beg/Int/Exp)
Ashley: Holy shit, that's insane! You're my hero! Please have sex with me!
It works every time...
2.
the game that fucking ownz you all. most people click around randomly not knowing what the hell they are doing and quit in 2 seconds when they don't realize the true 1337ness of the game.
*computer class* Fuck this assignment i'm playing minesweeper bitches
3.
the game that comes on every ones computer and yet noone knows how to play.
wtf idk how to play minesweeper but i like clicking the buttons anyway.
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4.
A drinking game played in a crowded bar. Players will keep thier eyes open for drinks other patrons have rested on the bar. The player will shout "MINE!" and snatch the drink and drink it as fast as possible. Guarantees a cheap night on the town at the risk of being beaten senseless or catching a disease
We ran out of money at the pub last night, so we just played a few rounds of minesweeper.
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5.
A minesweeper occurs when a girl gets her bikini stuck up her buttcrack. She utilizes both pointer fingers to simultaneously and symmetrically sweep the bikini out of her ass.
Megan was lying on the beach all day and when she finally stood up, she needed to pull a minesweeper to fix her bikini wedgie.
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