Minnesota

What is Minnesota?


1.

1. State...ass

2. Hell of a lot better than Wisconsin, but then again Wisconsin is better than Mighigan (Detroit is a Minneapolis wannabe)

3. California shopping my ass, we have the biggest mall in the country...suck it

4. Nice people

5. Better weather

6. Best schools (No really, best rated)

Shitty Little Kid: Mom, why are we going to Minnesota

Mom: Umm, because it's like the best place ever.

2.

Minnesota: an upper MidWest state, populated by Nordic descendants (hence the Vikings NFL team) and Native Americans. Located on the edge of the flat and seemingly endless praire, the state gets blast-chilled by polar winds for most of the year. The bulk of the people live in the Twin Cities (hence the MN Twins MLB team) and the surrounding cookie-cutter sprawl, while the rest of the state is scattered with God-forsaken iron mining towns (up north) or small, Lutheranesque farming communities that produce wheat and soybeans, which later get moved around by unsightly, rectangular barges down the Mississippi river or shipped to far-away places from the Duluth harbor. The state is characterized by high taxes, high welfare levels (possibly Scandinavian influences), strong economy (scores of large co.'s are HQed here, incl. Gen Mills that made the cereal you are for breakfast, 3M that made your lint roller, Medtronic that made your grandpa's pacemaker, Hormel that makes the Spam you grew up on, Polaris that made your uncle Duffy's snowmobile, Target, whose repulsive target-eye dog seems to be everywhere, etc.), changing demographics (growing Latino, Somali and Hmong enclaves), changing politics (a pronounced shift to the right). Vacationing generally means "goin' to the cabin up Nort'" for fishing and boating, while the winter is spent is super-luxurious ice fishing shacks with TVs and bunk beds, drinking the local Grain Belt beer. The people are overall Minnesotah-nice, meaning that anything that they disapprove of is glossed over as "oh, that's different". The state's public radio service (recently renamed AMerican Public Media) produces some of the most popular national programs, such as Prairie Home Companion, Marketplace, Speaking of Faith, St Paul Sunday, Futuretense, etc. Quite a feat for a semi-frozen swath of land that has about 5 mil people in it.

Minnesota frequently makes it on the last page of your daily hometown paper as the coldest place in the nation.

3.

the land of 3 seasons, winter, summer, and road construction.

"the gophers won against the hawkeyes, so in celebration i teabagged an iowan.

4.

Our governor used to be able to beat up your governor. bitch.

"Im jesse ventura, i kick ass"

See james

5.

*The state of hockey.

*Home to Hockey town,usa (not to be confused with the "fake" hockey town,usa 'detroit'...detroit is a city..not a town fawkers)

*land of 10,000 lakes

*minnesota nice...unless of course you are driving

*We do not say "eh"...thats canada

*"a's" and "o's" are pronounced differently than everyone else....

"Im from minnesotah!"

6.

minnesota is best state in the whole country. it has a wide variety of weather situations inculding SUMMER where the temperature can reach up to about 100 degrees. there are a lot of different races religons and people here and PLUS our governer can beat up your governer!

all minnesotans are extremly sexy and very good at snowboarding or skiing

See andrea

7.

A land of many things. Depending where you are at. Lots of alcoholics and snow. However there is also lots of nice people and sun. Land of lakes and land of mosquitoes. Land of people who are smart and are dumb. But where ever you are in Minnesota you can most of the time have fun.

"Brr, it's freaking cold out here!"

next day

"Damn, it's freaking hot out here!"


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